Helia joins the circus

Next thing you know I will be getting calls to join the circus, or go on Oprah, or Jerry Springer (is he even still around?), or the Guiness Book of World Records, or be the new model/mascot to replace Jane Russell for Playtex brassieres.

Yes, I am trying to be funny. In the face of some bizarreness going on in my life, I think I have the right to try to maintain some sanity in an otherwise strange situation and circumstance.

I do appreciate all the email I have been getting. Thanks to you all. I can use the support....pun intended.

Someone asked: what does this to regarding your implants? Well, it makes them null and void. I am actually working on an operation to have them removed. (I hate the idea of going under the knife. Sharp objects, ya know. Brrrrrrr) However, that won't happen until the M (macromastia) comes under control, and then I would/will probably have reductive surgery done. MAYBE. Basically its all up to me and my health. My back is pretty strong from years of toting around what I already had. I have maintained a somewhat decent workout regiment because of the fact.

Now if the tailor-made tops and brassieres wouldn't seem like they'd end up costing me a fortune...

BIGGER Helia

I feel I owe a few of you guys a little explanation, for the reason why I have been acting “ready” but then staying a bit distant. I have to tell you, my aloofness is not due to not wanting to get together with you. On the contrary, I feel extraordinarily drawn to a friendly rendezvous with you and hope in the future the planning will come to fruition. I have told only one of my closet net friends about what has been going on, something I informed of him months ago, and feel the need to tell my other close friends now.

Just after the beginning of the year, I started actually growing again. Growing in the chest region. Hard to believe that after my condition remained what seemed in submission for all this time, poof, it rears up. It was no surprise to my doctor, stating often when hormonal changes occur, especially in the rare minority of women who actually have the rare condition (macromastia), the condition (hormonal imbalance) can re-surface. You don’t have to be going through puberty to have it happen.

Yes yes yes. You may and will find it hard to believe. Myself--as my friend Tige can back me up--I have been both in a state of depression and anxiety, and excitement over the expansion of my already enormous "girls". I think it is my fascination with it all that makes me feel so ill at ease sometimes. This is a fantasy but reality, and when I am thinking straight, it all seems awkward and somewhat a curse.

So I’ve been getting bigger since about February. I have been on and off medication. The meds probably screw me up worse because they keep every hormones in check, including emotional. I have also gained a lot of weight, nearly 60 pounds (about 35 is breast weight. REALLY!). I’m not shy about my body so I can admit, yeah, I’ve gotten a bit chubby.

So what I am saying to my dear friends is that I hope you will not be annoyed at me for my topsy-turvy mindset, the eagerly anticipated meetings then the no-email-in-days letdown, or lack of definite plans. I have been both nervous and excited to tell you this truth of the current happenings in my life. They are crazy. They are outrageous…but they are me. Bizarre as I seem to be.

I hope you all will continue to write. I hope I haven’t alienated anyone too much. You are all special to me.

Sometimes life is stranger than fiction.

When in BE mode Part 3

My favorite BE stories that have been written about me or for me (and I do not mean to sound all vain or anything there...I feel very privileged people have written stories for me...always have, always will so thank you one and all)...anyway, my favorite BE stories written for me by outside fans and friends:

I love them all, namely the ones by Tigeras and Freddybear, CK, Wren, Strig, John and Dr Inflate. Favorites are Rocky Mountain Helia, Helia rises to the Occasion, Hiss, Boardroom Blowout, Starlite. Tigeras's and Freddybear's are too numerous to name and I suppose I ought to dedicate a BLOG or two simply to these two great people who have gone above and beyond. CK is the next super in my BE story list.

Really, I hate to single anyone out because you've all done such a great job in taking my fantasy and making it yours and ours. When I've had writers block, a lot of you have slipped in to fill the void. IT IS APPRECIATED. Kisses to you all.

Most of your stories I have posted at www.ladybumps.com, some haven't made it there yet, some are too personal between us to post, or I simply want to hog them up all to my li'l ole self. Hope you don't mind for those of you who know who you are when I state the above.

And really I have to thank Dan at Inflate123 who REALLY let me share myself and my stories originally. I looove all his work. THE LAB is one of my favorites...I even borrowed it and put myself in the place of the woman in the story. I can't post it because Inflate123 owns copyright, but it sure is a great tale.

I am always always open to filled up with more of you guys stories...so feel free to write away.